Planning the funeral also gave us something to focus on during those first terrible empty days after coming home from hospital." Watching my husband carrying his coffin over to his burial spot was heartbreaking but also such a precious demonstration of love. It is not something you ever expect to be doing but it was so important to us to mark Arthur’s life and express some of our grief at losing him. We were able to do everything we wanted to and share it with our family and friends. "My husband and I planned the funeral together and it was beautiful. Remember that you are allowed to change your mind. It might help to take some time before making this decision. ![]() You can also choose not to be there and to allow the hospital and their undertaker to make all the arrangements. Some parents find comfort in making the funeral personal to them and their baby. What happens at the ceremony is your decision. You may have important religious wishes or practices that you would like observed, or you may want a very different type of non-religious event with poetry and singing. ![]() The arrangements that you choose to make to mark your baby’s death in the ceremony are very personal. You can organise the funeral yourself, liaising directly with the crematorium or cemetery.There may be a fee but it is likely to be a reduced rate. You can ask a funeral home to do it for you, in which case you will be supported by the funeral director.For example, some hospitals can only offer cremation and some provide shared ceremonies or burial in a shared grave. ![]() If you do choose a hospital funeral, much of the paperwork and decision-making will be done for you but you may find that your choices are limited.
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